Sometimes adults let their feelings override their common sense, as in the case of my mother-in-law, Margaret. She became dismissive of my daughter, but I knew how to make her learn from her mistake.

Margaret doted on my four-year-old twin boys, Jake and Josh, but ignored my seven-year-old daughter, Lily. One evening, Lily asked, “Mom, does Grandma not love me anymore?” Her words broke my heart. She revealed that Margaret had said Lily didn’t deserve to visit because she was “just like her pathetic mom.”

I confronted my husband, David, who was shocked. We decided to address it with Margaret. At her house, we explained Lily’s feelings. Margaret admitted, “Lily reminds me of Emily, and we’ve had our differences. It’s easier to bond with the boys.”

David was firm, “You can’t treat our children differently because of your feelings towards Emily.”

Margaret, tearful, apologized, “I’ll try to do better.”

We decided Margaret wouldn’t babysit until she could treat all the kids equally. Weeks later, she invited us for dinner. To my surprise, she made a genuine effort to engage with Lily, asking about her school and friends, and complimenting her drawings. Lily was delighted.

After dinner, Margaret admitted to me, “I want to be a better grandmother. I know it will take time, but I’m willing to work on it.”

Progress was slow but steady. One night, as I tucked Lily in, she smiled, “Mom, I think Grandma loves me again.”

“She always did, sweetie,” I replied. “Sometimes grown-ups make mistakes, but they try to fix them.”

We were on the right path.