At 35, I consider myself lucky: a stable tech job, a beautiful home, and a wife, Jane, who makes every day brighter. We don’t have kids yet, but our life together is near perfect — except for one complication: her mother, Celia. Celia has always made everything about herself, undermining any thoughtful gift I give Jane, whether it’s jewelry, trips, or surprises.

Last Mother’s Day, I arranged flowers from my late mom’s garden in a restored vase, hoping to please Celia. Instead, she scoffed, comparing my gift to Jane’s diamonds, muttering that it was “just weeds.” Jane was mortified, and I realized nothing I did would make her happy. Her constant criticism tested my patience, but Jane always tried to see the best in her mother.

Then Jane asked for a tarantula — a Chilean Rose Hair — for her collection of eclectic curiosities. Though I hesitated, I bought it. Seeing her excitement reminded me how much she’s supported all my odd hobbies. An idea struck.

A week later, I ordered the same species, terrarium, and care kit, addressed to Celia with a note: “Since you always want what Jane gets. Enjoy! Love, Andrew.” I waited.

Three days later, my phone exploded with furious calls from Celia. She screamed about the giant hairy spider in a secure enclosure. Her brother had to “banish” it, recounting her cartoonish terror.

Jane laughed until she cried. The bracelet, gifts, and jealous complaints were forgotten. Celia hasn’t demanded equal gifts since, and Jane adores me even more. Moral: ask for the same as someone else, and you just might get exactly what you deserve — chaos included.