My mother-in-law, Charlene, has always been passive-aggressive, but what she did recently left me speechless. One Saturday, I flipped through channels and saw her on a talk show. She was telling the world my husband, Holden, was a widower, and that I, his “late wife,” wasn’t good enough for him. The shock was overwhelming.

When Holden came home, I showed him the clip, and we devised a plan. The next morning, Holden called Charlene, pretending I had died. Charlene panicked and rushed over, only to find me alive, sipping tea on the couch.

Charlene’s face turned pale when she saw me. Holden confronted her. “You went on TV and declared my wife dead just to replace her?” he demanded. Charlene stammered, trying to defend herself, but Holden cut her off. “You crossed a line, Mom. If you can’t respect my wife, you’re done.”

Realizing the magnitude of her mistake, Charlene fled in tears. Holden and I sat back, stunned. “Well,” I said, “she won the stupid prize.”

Maybe next time, we’ll throw a real funeral—for her delusions.