70-year-old widow posts newspaper advert looking for new husband, only for it to go viral

Getting back into the dating world can be strange, and intimidating, especially if it’s been a long time since you were last single. Of course, the most important lesson to remember is that it’s crucial you stay open to others and don’t judge anyone too quickly.

It was with that in mind that I decided to share a funny story I recently came across online. It involves a 70-year-old widow, a newspaper advert, and a search for a new husband.

She was at home one day when her doorbell suddenly rang … only, she couldn’t possibly have predicted who would be on the other side.

Read the full hilarious joke below — and make sure you stick with it until the punchline.

A lonely 70-year-old widow decided that it was time to marry again…

She put an ad in the local newspaper that read:

“Husband wanted! Must be in my age group, must not beat me, must not run around on me and must still be good in bed. All applicants please apply in person.”

The following day, she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a gray-haired gentleman sitting in a wheelchair. He had no arms or legs.

“You’re not really asking me to consider you, are you?” the widow asked: “Just look at you — you have no legs!”

The old gent smiled: “Therefore, I cannot run around on you!”

“You don’t have any arms either!” she snorted.

Again, the old man smiled: “Therefore, I can never beat you!”

She raised an eyebrow and asked intently: “Are you still good in bed?”

The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said: “I rang the doorbell, didn’t I?”

Related Posts

Fans fear Kanye West’s wife Bianca Censori could face jail time over NSFW Grammys outfit

Bianca Censori is no stranger to bold fashion, but her latest outfit at the 67th Grammy Awards sparked outrage. Arriving with husband Kanye West, she dropped her…

My Ex-MIL Sent Me a Generous Gift After My Divorce, but Her Clause Made Me Say No — Two Years Later, I Saw Her Crying in the Park

After a painful divorce, Emilia struggled to rebuild her life, overwhelmed with debt and loneliness. One day, a mysterious package arrived from her ex-mother-in-law, Jill. Inside was…

My Late Father Left Me a House, but the Woman Living There Revealed a Secret That Changed Everything — Story of the Day

After my father passed, I was shocked to learn he had left me a house I had never heard of. At the notary’s office, I received documents…

I Found an Envelope in My MIL’s First Aid Kit – She and My Husband Had an Agreement Behind My Back

After my baby Ethan was born, my mother-in-law, Ruth, seemed like a helpful presence. She frequently showed up uninvited, offering “support,” which I initially welcomed as I…

My Stepmom Stole $5,000 from My College Fund to Install Veneers for Herself — Karma Hit Her Hard

At 17, Kristen’s college fund was her future—one her late mother set up and her dad, Bob, helped build. Enter Tracy, her vanity-driven stepmom, who was obsessed…

My Parents Left Me with My Uncle & Aunt So They Could Raise Only My Sister – 12 Years Later, They Reached Out over Christmas

At just 10 years old, Melody’s life shattered when her parents sent her to live with her grandmother while they focused on her younger sister Chloe’s gymnastics…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *